Four Years Ago...

It was four years ago, November 7th 2005, that I waited with a mix of blinding fear and utter relief coursing through me. It was this on this day, at 5:00am that we sat in the Special Care Unit counting down the final moments before V would be taken for his life saving heart repair surgery.

We couldn't easily hold him because of all the wires that were hooked to his tiny body. He was barely 5 pounds. At one point I took off his clothes so we could get some final, scar free pictures of his little body. Those moments, at 7 weeks old, would be the last that he ever spent free from scars. From that day forward every few months they would be cutting into him for one reason or another. Four years later that hasn't changed.

Around 7am they took him. We got to carry him down the hall to the surgery suite and kiss him goodbye one final time. One final time, as a child fighting to breathe, to eat, to move blood and oxygen through his body. Fighting to live. We hoped with everything we had that when he awoke it would be to a new life.

There were many fears. Not just for his heart, but for his blood, his bone marrow to come back clean. They were aspirating a sample from his sternum when it was cut to reach his heart. They feared he may have leukemia. That day they were fighting to win one battle, but would we win the rest of the war?

The heart surgery would take hours, but the marrow would take two weeks. It might as well have been forever...

Hour by hour they updated us. His chest is open... His sternum is open... The marrow has been collected... He is on bypass...

The repair is complete... He is off bypass and his heart is beating...

When we saw him in the ICU we were both shocked and relieved. He looked horrific and beautiful all in the same breath.

His repair went well and they were very hopeful. Two weeks later his marrow came back clean.

For now...

We were advised that due to a blood disorder he was born with in combination with the increased risk from having Down Syndrome, that V's chances of developing cancer in his lifetime were very high. But for now we were winning.

You all know the rest.. For now we are still winning...

Happy Heart Day baby.